You Know You’re a Swimmer If…

I have been reading Swim: Why We Love the Water by Lynn Sherr and thoroughly enjoying it.  It is exactly the kind of non-fiction that I love.  It explores an aspect of my life in an entertaining way.  Sherr shares her stories of open water swims including journeys in waters from all over the world.

Anyway, I will do a full review once I am finished but in one of the asides she lists You Know You’re a Swimmer If… and I thought some of them were quite funny and true:

You Know You’re a Swimmer If…

1. You’re crossing a bridge and think, “I could swim across this…”

2. People ask you to do a triathlon, and you say you would if it weren’t for the run and bike parts.

3. You put off the decision to color your hair until after the summer swimming season.

4. You have more swimsuits hanging in your closets than dresses

5. You have an emergency swim bag in your car just in case…

6. You can’t remember the last time you took a shower at home (totally true with me in the winter bc I always shower at the gym!)

7. Bugs die of chlorine poisoning when they land on your skin

8. You say to your dog, ‘wanna go for a swim?’ and she gets more excited than offering a walk

9. You find yourself counting strokes instead of sheep to fall asleep at night.  Then, just when you’re about to fall asleep, instead of leg twitching a little bit, it does a full whip kick and you ride the glide to slumberland.

10. You get in the water and feel like an eagle in the sky (so true!)

11. You’re first thought when trying on bathing suits is ‘how will this help me with my stroke’ not ‘Will this make my legs look big?’

12.  Men in speedos is routine…

13. You get physically excited when someone says ‘oh I love to swim too…’.  It’s a match!

(Those last 3 I made up)

Got any to add my friends?

There actually is a whole blog just on this topic


7 thoughts on “You Know You’re a Swimmer If…

    1. LOL. So true. I just bought new towels because mine were worn through. Maybe that’d be another. You know your a swimmer if you have to buy new towels every year.

  1. Nearly your entire wardrobe consists of swimming shirts, sweatshirts, shorts, and pants.

    You always have red circles around your eyes.

    You sweat chlorine.

    Your hair is always wet, and ladies— your hair is always in a messy bun.

    You can’t understand why people worry about having a “bikini body” for the summer.

    When a non-swimmer asks you about your swimming, you get annoyed because you are pretty sure they know absolutely nothing about the sport, and that it will require a lot of explaining.

    You share a love/hate relationship with your coach.

    You actually love pain.

    You would win an eating contest against a football player.

    Your shins are always bruised from those darn diving sets.

    You pretty much know how many tiles there are from one end of the pool to the other.

    You cringe when you think about New Year’s Eve.

    Christmas break? What Christmas Break? Holidays are just an excuse for an extra practice.

    You ladies have a permanent hickey on your neck.

    Your skin is ALWAYS dry.

    You have few non-swimmer friends because you can never hang out with them.

    When ever you see a swimming related shirt at the store, you just have to have it.

    You know what Splash magazine is, and you look forward to reading it each month.

    You know who Justin Case is, and you love looking for him.

    You get very excited about Speedo’s newest catalog.

    You barely recognize fellow swimmers when they have dry hair and normal clothes on.

    When you go to the pool with friends, you can’t help but to break out a few strokes and/or flip turns.

    You don’t even have to think twice about peeing in the pool, and it really doesn’t gross you out.

    You can’t get through a meet without your music.

    There is nothing better than a continental breakfast.

    There is nothing worse than a warm pool.

    Your hairstylist never fails to tell you how slimy your hair is.

    It is not weird for girls to stop shaving their legs, and for guys to start shaving theirs.

    You have had to scrape the frost off of the inside windows of your car.

    You swim between 2-4 hours a day, 5-7 days a week, for 7 months for a race that lasts less than 2 minutes.

    Two days off of practice might as well be two weeks; you will pay for it all the same.

    Your decorate your fins.

    You have almost gotten into a fight with the lane line during that backstroke set in the summer.

    Your conversations take place in 15 second intervals.

    You find yourself doing random shoulder stretches in class.

    You collect, or have collected, swim caps.

    You have a permanent suit tan.

    You can swim longer distances than you could ever run.

    You have gone two weeks without a normal shower.

    You have trouble fitting into clothes because your shoulders are so broad.

    You have mastered the art of deck changing.

    Low- carb diet? WHAT?!! Your staple foods are bagels and pasta!

    You talk about quitting, but never do.

    You critique the way people swim on TV or movies, because their technique is just AWFUL.

    Every conversation somehow reverts back to swimming.

    You get really annoyed when people say they like to swim, and act like their hour in the pool a month compares to your 2 hours a day.

    You really hate those people who have a fast seed time, but end up finishing last— or vice versa.

    You can smell a pool from a mile away.

    You pretty much get all A’s and B’s in school.

    You wear flip flops and sandals year round.

    You are guilty of wearing socks with flip flops.

    It’s ok for you to wear Crocs, but no one else.

    You regularly buy your suits two sizes too small.

    You have the sound of “take your marks… beep!” forever engrained in your mind.

    A 10:00 am practice on Saturday morning means you get to SLEEP IN!

    You acquire the ability to detect lightning from miles away.

    Your teachers almost expect your absence.

    Your summer job takes place at a pool.

    1. Great list! Thanks. I especially loved the hickey one for open water swimming. I had the worst one after my first 5k and I had to go to a wedding that night. Scandal!
      I also like the one about no vacations. The only time I really vacation is when I go to Hawaii and whet am I doing the whole time? Swimming (and reading)! 🙂

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