So everyone knows I’m not a woe is me single girl but some days it does kind of suck. New Years and Valentines being the chief offenders. I don’t think there are any more ‘coupley’ holidays in the calendar year.
The only thing that makes New Years slightly worse is there is no ignoring it like with Valentines and almost every ‘fun’ activity involves dancing, which I hate.
I have never liked dancing. For starters I have almost no natural rhythm and I’m not just being modest. I literally have no natural rhythm. I hate the music typically played at dances. I don’t like club music and find DJs to be obnoxious. Its also so loud that you can’t talk and you end up either as a wallflower which sucks or gyrating to ‘Everybody Dance Now’ like an idiot. It’s also dark and hard to see anyone so I don’t know how anyone hooks up at a dance but it is the activity of choice for ‘meeting people’ and coupling up in Utah. (Dancing and Utah have a long unfortunate relationship. They love it there! 😦 )
With dancing out of the picture this year I’m left with the choice of hanging out with my sister and her boyfriend or my parents and their older group of adults from church. My younger siblings are both doing activities with their friends. I don’t have any friends in California and would rather be hit by a bread truck than go to the YSA dance alone.
So, what’s a girl left to do? Any ideas?
I will probably go to a movie so at least I will be surrounded by people but not have to dance. (And yes, I go to movies by myself all the time. In fact, I like it!And no, I will not be seeing New Years Eve because it looks terrible and seeing it on New Years Eve is just depressing). Normally I don’t mind being by myself. In fact, I kind of love it! But on super coupley days it is easy to feel a bit forgotten, left behind.
This is my first New Year in my 30’s and its been a hard year, one I am not eager to repeat. I am ready for a string of good luck and period of peace (or at least no major medical diagnosis!). I know I’ve had many blessings also but it has been one of the most challenging years of my life.
It seems like 30 is a rough year for a lot of people I know. It represents a transition both mentally and physically that can be difficult for ‘stay-the-samers’ like me to deal with.
I have never been a big fan of change, especially change I don’t direct and manage, but like a time bomb it comes whether you like it or not! 30 is the first step to being old…Even at church I will soon not be considered a ‘young single adult’. I will be a ‘mid-single’. In January I have to change wards and start attending the mid-singles ward, which I am sure will be great but it is a change (which again, I’m not a fan of!).
Maybe I should just plan a trip next year for New Years, go to Hawaii or something like that? That always makes me happy. Just thinking of Hawaii makes me happy. I love being home for Christmas but the week after can be rough. I miss my apartment, car, friends, gym, food, trainer, etc. At least this year I get my 9 days off of my strict diet. That’s been a real treat (literally and figuratively).
I wish my family enjoyed traveling during the holidays but my younger siblings would revolt. I love it! One of my happiest Christmas memories was when my family came to Utah and stayed in our home in Alpine. It was so nice to not have to worry about all the Christmas stuff and to be able to see my family while still having my own space. If I had my druthers we’d do that every year.
But I don’t know that New Years would suck any less if I was at home. My friends and I used to have awesome parties but in recent years they’ve died down. (We used to have great Halloween parties also but that has died out too 😦 ). For me, parties and the like feel a very college, post-college thing to do. As a 30 year old woman I find it is so much harder to get anyone together. I have lots of entertaining ideas for cute parties but I’m not convinced anyone would be able to come to a party if I put a lot of work into it. People are just so busy and have other obligations that are more important by the time you turn 30.
I’m also not sure what it means to be 30. With other ages the expectations are real clear (20’s college, gain a career). I think it is supposed to bring all those experiences with kids but not so much with me. It’s all a bit of a mystery, the 30’s mystery.
Anyway, don’t mean to complain. I just wanted to get it out there that New Years sucks and I’m pretending like it doesn’t exist. Be gone 2011!
To my single friends out there- don’t you agree that New Years is a total drag?
Rachel's Musings 
The thing about New Year’s is that, for most of us, it’s just a silly holiday that makes us feel like we *should* be partying and having a totally cool life, even though in reality we were just fine not partying.
Adrienne Jensen
I think you are right. I think most of the time those parties when you actually do them are super lame anyway.
Maybe that’s why people get really drunk on New Years? Drown out the disapointment the night causes?
I couldn’t agree more that New Years Eve sucks especially when your friends are all married, starting families and engaged to be married. Plus on top of that going to your friends house granted (is fun) but at the same time everyone is already attached with their husbands, wives, boyfriends and girlfriends and you know with everyone already attached there isn’t any other single people. Plus it’s totally weird that for the most part most couples don’t want to help there single friends get hooked up. It’s weird how already hooked up couples have like this stupid switch that says when they are hooked up no can do to help the single friends 😦 :(!! It’s like ok were hooked up now you single friend are on your own!!!
Thanks for the comment! I’m glad I’m not the only one! I think most married people just don’t into contact with that many singles. I have never had a real set up from my married friends.
I think New Years would be easier if I had a few friends where my parents live. It isn’t where I grew up so if my siblings are busy that kind of leaves me in the lurch.
So, this year I think I am going to go see Mission Impossible and have a little party just for me. I had my pity party and now I will make the evening fun whether I have a +1 or not. Still, someday it would be nice to have someone to share the New Year with.
Another difficulty is that single and married people have such different schedules and life focuses. It can feel like different planets at times. Still, I try to dig down and remember that deep down we are still the same people, still friends, regardless of our marital status.
I just turned 20, literally a few days ago, and I feel like New Years should be a great time and mark something special in my life… But when all you’re friends are taken, and you are forever single (like me it seems) New Years sucks. I totally agree.
I’m surprised so many of your friends are taken at 20 but I can definitely relate. I have felt like the odd man (or woman) out on many occasions. This is the first year I felt that way with my family, as I am one of the oldest kids. I had my moment of frustration and even depression but I figured out a way to have a good time. It may not be the great party you envision but usually when you go to those parties they are kind of lame anyway.
I really do think New Years and Valentines Day are the hardest holidays for singles (also weddings totally suck!). The thing that is the most frustrating is I feel there is this void in my life that I can do nothing (or very little) to make happen. There was a man at my parents party tonight that said he was ‘glad his children didn’t chose to be single or not have kids’. That’s how some people see it. That I am choosing to be single over having a family! It makes me crazy! Best advice just deal with those feelings, be honest, and then do all you can to create happiness in your life. People are going to be stupid and prejudiced and even rude, but that is true in many phases of life- there are always haters…Feel free to vent to me whenever needed. I totally understand. 🙂
Reblogged this on Smilingldsgirl's Weblog and commented:
This year I’m sick. New Years Eve always disappoints.
New year eve always sucks.
Agree!
The worst year ever for me, bro left the country ,a relationship only last 1 day and destroy our friendship, then a friend suddenly cancelled the meeting up jst b4 xmas. All happened in last couple of month. Sometime, I wish I never wake up the next morning. No one can understand and talk to. But I guess someone out there might be worse then me. Today was the day I broke up with previous ex. Don’t know how 2013 will be better.
Wow that sounds awful. Sorry. Hang in there! I got sick this year. Last year I was all alone. I think New Years is the most ‘look you’re single after Valentines Day’.
The sad part is I actually had 2 parties I could have gone to this year but was sick, so I can’t. Cough, cough, cough… Sigh
Glad u had party u can go to and u should jst go to one of the party for couple of hour 🙂 . Hope u get better soon. It is now 1st jan here, wish u have a better New year.
That’s a great idea about planning a trip on NYE. I think I may do that next year. I say VEGAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That would be totally fun.
If it works out-wanna meet up? 🙂
Sure. I have tons of contacts in vegas.